Thursday, September 13, 2012

Taking the Power Back

"Take your power back from life's whims and other people's agendas."

That's the quote I read this morning from the ever insightful Mastin Kipp. And, boy, did I need to read that. Life has been a real whir lately. Between my day job sucking the life out of me, trying my best to create and market the After Sunset Fall line and grow my business, unexpected dentist/doctors appointments, kicking off a new exercise/eating schedule, etc. it's been a battle trying to stay afloat.

I can't remember the last time I went to bed peacefully, feeling accomplished. There are always ten other things on my to-do list that have yet to be checked off and I let that hang over me. Lately, I've just been feeling defeated. Not only for not having checked off the things on my list but for not checking off the things not on my list. [Lots of nots there.]

The things I need to do for my own sanity, for my growth.

Although I'm not ready to talk about it here on this blog, I've mentioned the fork in the road that I have come to in my life. The opportunities I have been wanting to create. They are going to take some careful planning, some hard work, and a whole lot of faith in myself and in God.
I know that I have to be as best prepared as possible.

But lately, because of all of life's whims and other people's agendas, I've had to put that time of preparation as the last item on my list. That last item that never gets checked off at the end of the day because of all the items before it.

I read this article by Mastin this morning and realized what I have to do.

I have to schedule my day. Every day. Not only do I need to write down the days I have meetings or projects due but I need to write down when to sleep, when to work out, when to think, when to not do anything but watch an hour of my show.

It might seem slightly ridiculous that I need to schedule some of these things into my daily life, but think about it: so many of them are equally as important. If I don’t work out, I probably won’t stay healthy. If I don’t work hard, I probably won’t make money. If I don’t take time to think or meditate, I probably won’t stay sane.

And, yes, there will be the days when I can’t do it all and I need to accept that. [It seems like everyday this week has been one of those days.] But I also need to make sure what I sacrifice on those days isn’t always the same thing. I can’t always sacrifice sleep or my dreams.

I caught myself saying numerous times lately, "I feel so out of control of my own life!"
This will be my way of taking the power back.


The Pink Growl said...

I feel slightly like this these days too. Mine is just life is throwing random things at me and I need to regain control. Hope things settle down for you soon and hope this fork in the road is an awesome one!

Erin said...

I've been feeling a little defeated myself lately. My job definitely feels like it's sucking the life out of me sometimes--- especially when I have passions and other interests I'm TRYING to pursue on the side. Glad to know I'm not the only one who obsessively tries to schedule each day :)

Amy Lynn said...

I know how you feel, every day seems like a struggle. Don't feel crazy about writing it all down, I do it too. It truly does help. You may not get everything accomplished every day, but you then at least know what items to carry over to the next day. I even include things like laundry and cleaning to my list just so I can budget my time. Good luck girl!

Holly said...

I am with you, girl! It's time we take some power back. I love your insight. I have started putting work outs on my planner and it's been helping me to stick to them. You have to do whatever it is to keep yourself healthy - mentally, physically and emotionally. Life is too short to take crap! Or to no feel satisfied or accomplished. I know you will figure it out. You are so strong and approach life so positively. I know it can be tough to finally do things for you, but I know you'll find your happy place and choose the right fork in your road :) Love you tons! xoxo

P.S. If you ever need to get away or need a break, I'm your girl!

Shayna said...

I think it's safe to say that you are not alone in this. I feel that way a lot of times too! Just when I think I'm going to have some extra time to get ____ done, WRONG! It is about scheduling & time management. It seems silly that you might have to "schedule" certain things but, if that's what works & gets it all done, then do it! I'm constantly writing to-do list like a crazy person! It's the only way I can remember everything!

Emily said...

I just found your blog and love this post. I am definintely feeling the same way! I have been trying to start something new but can't quite leave the stable job yet (but going to work when there are so many other/better things you can be doing is pure torture to the soul). I will have to follow in your footsteps about writing everything down on a to do list... even if is just sleep, and schedule time for it all!
I guess we all have to make it out of this quarter life crisis at some point right?!
Can't wait to read more of your blog!

Royar said...

I feel like this all the time! I write my agenda, or my "state of the union" every single night for the next day, and it really does help! xo

Royar said...

I meant to add one more thing, I absolutely loved this post! Extremely well written and I completely agree!

Katie said...

I feel this exact same way...I'm a new follower. I have a feeling tha tI"m going ot get a lot of really great things out of your blog. I can't wait to read more :)