Friday, November 16, 2012

Reminded of the Detours

Some days, you're going about with your normal life
Finding your new "normalcy" again
Getting into the groove of the life that's been re-routed time and time again.

And you're reminded of the detours;

The reasons life is no longer what it used to be.

Last night, I picked up Missy's ashes from the vet
Nearly two weeks after she left this world
And when I found out it was time to pick them up...
     My world shook just a little.
          It was as though my body stood still while another version of it kept walking onward
               To continue on with what was next.
                    Picking up her ashes.

I wasn't the same for the remainder of the night.
I felt cranky. Moody. Irritated. Annoyed. Frustrated.

It's like my body just rejected the pain.
And turned it into another emotion.

It's like I heard the "I'm sorry for your loss" phrase one more time and, boom.
My heart was done.
Done dealing with it.


To be honest, I don't know where this post goes from here.
I'm not sure I have a conclusion.
For now, I'll just keep cuddling Stella even more than I used to [like above]
And I'll be grateful that I'm part of a community where posting pictures of you & your pet is totally normal ;)
I'll also probably watch Pretty Little Liars
     to take my mind away from the detours until my heart gets back on track.

Speaking of Pretty Little Liars, who watched The Vampire Diaries last night?
    [I realize they are un-related]
       Oh.My.Gosh. Happy Friday and thanks for all your love & support this year!

7 comments:

The Pink Growl said...

Hugs to you my sweet friend! Losing a pet is a terrible thing. I lost a precious pup back in 2010 and it still can get me down sometimes. I hope that this weekend will be full of distractions - for us both!

Holly said...

You are so strong, sweet friend. But you can take time to grieve. It's OK. Sad, mad, grumpy or otherwise, whatever you have to do to is what you need to do and feel at that moment to truly grieve for Missy. So it might be a detour for now, but make sure to look for some good views along the way :)

Shayna said...

Oh Chelsea! I'm so sorry! I totally know what you mean about just shutting off & being numb to that phrase. While it's meant well, it still has this shuttering effect. Just know that without all of these re-routes, detours & hurdles you wouldn't be who you are today. (& yes, I realize that doesn't make things better b/c it doesn't for me either). But, just know that it's all in His plan for you. Hugs to you sweet friend!

Jenn said...

There's not much anyone can say to make this ache feel better, so just know, I'm sending you hugs!

Raquel said...

My heart aches for you sweetie :( I can't imagine how hard it must be for you.

Laura said...

So hard to go through that! I dread the day my sweet Stella will no longer be here. Many prayers to you to help you get through it.

Kristen said...

awww so sorry love! give stella extra loves