2013: The Best Year Yet

2013 was the best year of my life. What's even crazier is that it followed the absolute worst year of my life. How does that happen? It's pretty phenomenal when I think about it. When I think about the way life works.

Life, the Universe, God, whatever you want to call it… hands us events and circumstances when we least expect them. Some of these events shape us, some completely change our life, and some leave us never to be the same again. The events that took place last year left scars that will forever remain a part of me. They caused me to change the way I live, the way I think, the way I make decisions, and the way I am.

2013 was the year I learned to say "no" to others. To do only what was true to myself. To honor my being. To stop pretending. To stop chasing. To stop settling.

2013 was the year I learned to say "yes" to myself. To give myself the go-ahead. To encourage myself. To go after my dreams like there was no tomorrow.

I think I may always look back at 2013 in awe, pleasantly surprised by all the beautiful, new moments that found their way into my life in such a short period of time. Proof that life really does unfold naturally, organically, and perfectly the way it is meant to when you live a life in harmony with your true purpose.

San Diego was the most gorgeous setting I could have asked for during this period of self-reflection. It inspired me, lifted me, and propelled me out into the big, endless, adventurous, exciting world that was always surrounding me, just waiting to be discovered. And as this year comes to a close, I can say with confidence that my time in San Diego is not over ;)

My journey is still just getting started, despite it being the end of one year and the beginning of another. All of our years are connected. They fluidly roll like the ocean's waves, one into another and so on. And at the end, we have one vast, beautiful body of water to look out to. Each year brings in new sets of waves, new currents, new freshness. Some years are spent surfing the waves and others are spent paddling back out in preparation for a new set that will take us even further.

I'm ready. Are you?

Happy New Year! Sending love and wishes for health and happiness to you all!

The Truth About Christmas Without Mom

If you've lost your mother, you may hear a phrase every so often: "I know this time of year is tough for you." Right now, Christmastime is that time of the year. This will be the second Christmas without my mom and I must say, it's much more difficult than last year was.

My last Christmas picture with my mom. 2009 at my work Holiday Party.

Last year was the first Christmas without my mom alive. I had moved to San Diego and flew back to the East Coast for about a week to spend time with family for what I knew was going to be a tough holiday for us. Although the year of "firsts" is painful, the shock of her death, at least for me, was still very much a factor last year. There was a lot of numbness, as I will still undergoing the different stages of grief. The death of my mother was unexpected and came without much warning. I went from having an argument with my mom one day to sitting by her bedside in the hospital as she took her last breath several days later. We had no idea, none at all, that 2011 would or even could be our last Christmas with her.

So Christmas 2012 was all about it "being the first Christmas without Mom." The numbness still wearing off, coupled with the pressure of trying to make it a good Christmas despite the empty chair at our dinner table, meant the utter pain was not as evident. It was masked. We all tried extra hard to feel the love she created every Christmas.

But this year, this Christmas... I feel double the amount of pain as last year. I'm no longer numb. I could feel the deep, pulsating pain as it started creeping in around Thanksgiving. I could start to sense it in my other family members too. My parents' house went undecorated. The Christmas tree remained unlit. The Spirit of Christmas was nowhere to be found and every time "It's the Most Wonderful Time of the Year" found its way onto the radio, I found myself rolling my eyes.

I tried to feel the Magic. I tried to get excited thinking about candy canes and snowflakes and stockings hung up. But, well, there were no candy canes, snowflakes, or stockings this year. My mom was the Spirit of Christmas. She was the one to decorate the house so magically, to dress up the presents with perfect ribbons and bows and to get the family all excited for spending the holiday together. As much as I've tried to keep them going, I've seen the traditions fade away this year. I've felt the pain with every mention of "Christmas." It's a shame, but it's the truth and that's why I'm writing about it here today.

Because I know that there are other people out there, some which I know personally and some that are strangers who are feeling this same pain that I write about. They know deep down, aside from all of the fluff and positive talk that nothing will replace the void that is felt while looking at the empty chair at the table and seeing the bare spot under the tree where her presents once were placed.

Part of my heart will forever be hollow all year, but during this time especially. I know that one day, with my own children, my heart will be filled in a different way. But nothing, nothing at all, will ever erase the pain of not having my sweet mom on Christmas.

She is missed.

25 Questions To Ask Yourself Before 2014: Part Three

Here we are. Part Three of the 25 Questions before 2014! I don't know about you, but I thought the five questions today were the toughest to answer! I had to dig even deeper to find the answers this time. If you're just joining us, hop over to this post to check out what it's all about and then feel free to link up your own answers! I am totally digging this time to just reflect :)

21. Who do I need to forgive? Thanks to Arielle Ford and her awesome book, The Soulmate Secret, I've done the work to forgive most people who were still, somehow, stuck in my heart. Unfortunately, some recent events brought back a few things for me. Forgiving people who've hurt you, apologized, and then continue to hurt you is often a hard battle to fight. It's usually in those instances that we realize we must put our foot down once and for all. And in that process, we must also forgive ourselves for letting someone bruise us yet again.

22. Where is it time to let go? I had something specific in mind but then I remembered the quote below. This past year, the mantra I've lived by is: "Show up, let go, serve others, and surrender the outcome." It's now my life motto. The phrase I live my life by. Well, the things that we hang onto are just that... things. They're ideas, thoughts, memories, projections, people, etc. And it's only once we let go, truly let go, that love can enter.

23. What old habits would I like to release? I want to erase all the conditioning and live a life in harmony with my innate self. Measure myself based only on myself, not on the timelines and social media announcements of others. I know I march by the beat of my own drum and sometimes the constant Facebook feed of engagements, bridal showers, and gender reveals makes me feel like maybe I live on a different planet? And I'm okay with that! I'm tired of being programmed to think that by age _____, I should _____. I've thrown out the timeline. I've got this one life to live (in this body, at least) and I'm doing it my way :) I'm also releasing my habit of sitting on ideas for longer than I should, as I mentioned yesterday because, again, life is precious!

24. What new habits would I like to cultivate? Decorating offices and apartments sooner than I've been known to :) Scheduling my day-to-day meetings and activities in my brand spankin' new calendar! Saying "no" more! And saying "yes" more to myself! Cleaning out and organizing everything (purses, bills, files, my phone, etc.) on a consistent basis. And overall, just following through with my own commitments to spend more time writing, brainstorming, reading, and meditating!

25. How can I be kind to myself? By honoring my true self, always. I think that's really what it all comes down to. That's what the past 24 questions have truly been about. What can we do this next year to honor ourselves in order to live the fullest year yet?

Life is a series of paths, turns, bridges, dead-ends, and detours. The compass we're given is the knowledge of our true self. Our life purpose. Our natural gifts and talents. I know in my heart that through being deeply connected and in tune with our truest, innate self, not only can we conquer all things that are thrown our way, but we can live a life of purpose, of bliss, and of unending potential for bigger and better things. Always. What a journey this is. Thank you to those of you who've participated in this process. These questions have certainly helped wrap up this year for me and help solidify my journey onward.

If you're not ready to stop the personal reflection and growth, I am taking new coaching clients for 2014! I would LOVE to work with you to help you find that compass of yours if it's lost, help you feel empowered to leave that toxic relationship or just ask for what you want out of life, or... fill in the blank :) The world is your oyster. Never forget that! Shoot me an email at chelsea.lifeisasunset@gmail.com and let me know what's on your mind, what areas you're wanting to make more stellar than ever before, and we'll chat!

Peace, love, and light to you all! Here's to the greatest year yet!

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25 Questions To Ask Yourself Before 2014: Part Two

Yesterday was awesome! I loved reading everyone's answers to the first 10 questions! It's not always easy to get deep with yourself and I think those of you who are doing this work are already light years ahead for the beginning of 2014! Way to go, my friends! Today we're answering questions 11-15! If you're just now joining, find all the details here and it's certainly not too late to join in! Ready, go!

11. When did I feel most creatively inspired? Many times when I was at the beach, in solitude. That is where my greatest writing took place, my jewelry designs were thought out, my clothing designs were imagined, and where my greatest ideas took place.

12. What projects have I completed? Moving cross country. Twice. RAW Showcase for my jewelry business. Started two new jobs (one in which I had my own clothing designs printed & sold by the company I worked for!) and my biggest project of all - my life coaching practice which will constantly be growing and expanding! 'Twas a stellar year!

13. How have I procrastinated? A lot of this is tied to #16. I've noticed that I hold myself back due to perfectionism. If something means a lot to me, such as a business project I'm working on, I sit on it and sit on it and sit on it before making a final decision. It is quite possibly one of THE biggest faults of mine because it really does prolong the process that much.

14. In what ways can I re-structure my time? Mastin Kipp has always stressed the importance of scheduling out your entire day, even all of the mundane activities such as eating a meal. Now that I have classes and clients and commutes thrown into the mix of my previously perfectly-scheduled life, it's time to take Mastin's advice. In 2014, I want to continue being in the best physical/spiritual/mental shape ever and that means being a bit more tedious with my schedule. I need to write-in my time for prayer/reflection, my time for the gym (and getting to/from there) and even time for free writing. I've found it's those personal things that often get put on the back burner and, guess what... it's those personal things that are usually most vital to keep at the top of our list!

15. How have I allowed fear of failure to hold me back? I think "fear of failure" is a bullsh*t term fed to us through worldly conditioning. Knock it off. I'm not scared of it. I don't view "failure" as failing. I view it as grace. When something goes awry, it's either because there is a lesson to be learned or because there is a better plan. Once that is realized, you'll never fear that bullsh*t failure again. You'll welcome that ish and eat it for breakfast! ;)

16. Where has self-doubt taken over? Self-doubt used to take over my entire life. All the inner work I did over the past two years has given me the confidence to stand firmly in the knowledge that I know what's best for me. BUT, I tend to second-guess myself (even when deep down, I know what I believe.) I sit on ideas for much longer than I really ought to, wondering if there is a "more perfect" idea that will come along later or perhaps a "more perfect" time. I have an irrational fear of making the wrong decision and this has prevented me many times from making any decision at all.

17. When have I felt the most alive? The exact moment occurred on a warm, San Diego night in late May. We were leaving the Padres' game (after they won!) Downtown that evening, and I was cruising on the back of my date's bike (wearing a helmet!) I had spent the entire night laughing and gazing at him, in awe of how great it had felt the past couple months to finally be captivated by someone again. As I put on my helmet that night, he gave me the sweetest surprise, and we rode off into the night (Like a fairytale. Literally.) which is when I felt most alive. Cruising through Mission Hills with the breeze on my face as we rode over beautiful bridges and saw the views of the skyline all lit up. I was there, blissfully happy in the city of my dreams.

18. How have I taught others to respect me? By refusing to wait around for people who operate on a "my timeline only" basis. I used to be the girl who'd wait around and reschedule my own schedule all the time for other people. Then, I learned how that gets you nowhere in life other than down a road of disappointment.

19. How can I improve my relationships? I think 2014 is going to be the year of the serious relationship for this girl. I've spent the past two years getting to really know myself, what I need/want in a partner, and have done a lot of personal and professional work and gotten my passion and purpose underway. I'm at a place now where I'm ready, and when the time is right, I'm excited for a primary relationship <3 :)

20. Have I been unfair to anyone? Nope. Everyone comes into our life for a reason and they usually leave for a reason too. I've examined what I've tolerated and had to be honest and fair to myself by telling some truths to others about how they've hurt me or by letting them go.

My Part One Answers :)

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25 Question To Ask Yourself Before 2014: Part One

In case you missed it last week, there's an article going around about a new approach to the "New Year's Resolution" thing. Instead, ask yourself these 25 questions before 2014! I've created a fun link-up for all of those who want to take part! We're answering the first 10 questions today. Find the link to the questions at the bottom of the post :)

1. What am I most proud of this year? Two things and they kind of go hand-in-hand. I'm proud to make my dream of moving to San Diego a reality despite all the nay-sayers throughout my life. In addition, I'm proud of doing the physical, spiritual, and mental work there to get where I am today. It allowed me to dig deeper than I ever have before, really connect with my true and innate self and find my purpose here in life :)

2. How can I become a better _____________? Life coach! Of course, I believe there are constantly things we can be working on and roles we can continue growing into. However, my role as a life coach will be my main focus in 2014.

3. Where am I feeling stuck? I can't say I feel fully stuck in one area really. Each week, there is a certain thing I may get hung up or stuck on, but it's usually never the same thing at once.

4. Where do I need to allow myself grace? I'm in another turning point in life. A lot of HUGE, spectacular, exciting new things are underway for my life. I have the tendency to get hung up on many little details, especially when the details are personally very important to me. I know the right thing to do is just to surrender the outcome to the Universe. Always. Easier said than done, right?

5. Am I passionate about my career? Yes! For the first time, ever, I am so entirely grateful for the career I have and am continuing to pursue. Working in the self-development/life coaching field is such a blessing. I love connecting with others and helping to lift them into their truest potential!

6. What lessons have I learned?
To surrender the outcome to the Universe.
"Owning our story and loving ourselves through that process is the bravest thing that we will ever do." - Brene Brown.
"Perceive obstacles as opportunities and problems as spiritual assignments." - Gabrielle Bernstein.
AND, to savor the waiting :)

7. What did my finances look like? About the same as always! 2014 is going to be abundant. I just know it ;)

8. How did I spend my free time? At the beach! I've written so many of these blog posts, so many journal entries, schemed up new dreams and bucket list items, and experienced some deeply intuitive moments while lying out on the sand in San Diego. Among all the chaos in the world around me, I could tune it all out and just be.

9. How well did I take care of my body, mind, and soul? Number one explained this a little bit. Let's just say, this was the healthiest year yet and I'm stoked to know that I can only go up now :)

10. How have I been open-minded? I moved to a new city full of strangers where I tried new foods, new drinks, new neighborhoods, new music, made new friends, dated new "types" and completely allowed myself to get out of my comfort zone in order to live fully present in those new moments.

If you want to link up, the rest of the questions can be found in this post! Post your answers to questions 11-20 tomorrow and 21-25 on Wednesday! Have fun and link-up below! I can't wait to see everyone's reflections on the past year!

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25 Questions To Ask Yourself Before 2014

Oh, my. Do I have a special treat for you today or what? A fellow life coach sent me a link this morning that I just had to pass along. As we near the end of the year and the beginning of a new one, many of us start reflecting back on this year, making goals, and perhaps "resolutions." Well, I invite you to dig a little deeper.

Below, I am going to list 25 questions from this awesome article. Find some time where you can be alone to really open up your heart and be honest about your 2013 in review. Sit with these questions and let the answers come to you organically, as they help guide you toward your truest, most fulfilling year yet.

1. What am I most proud of this year?
2. How can I become a better _____________?
3. Where am I feeling stuck?
4. Where do I need to allow myself grace?
5. Am I passionate about my career?
6. What lessons have I learned?
7. What did my finances look like?
8. How did I spend my free time?
9. How well did I take care of my body, mind, and soul?
10. How have I been open-minded?
11. When did I feel most creatively inspired?
12. What projects have I completed?
13. How have I procrastinated?
14. In what ways can I re-structure my time?
15. How have I allowed fear of failure to hold me back?
16. Where has self-doubt taken over?
17. When have I felt the most alive?
18. How have I taught others to respect me?
19. How can I improve my relationships?
20. Have I been unfair to anyone?
21. Who do I need to forgive? (feel free to be vague in your actual post answer)
22. Where is it time to let go?
23. What old habits would I like to release?
24. What new habits would I like to cultivate?
25. How can I be kind to myself?

And now, for the best part! I invite you to blog your answers. Or, if you don't blog, journal them! Write them down somewhere, not only to hold yourself accountable, but so that you can reflect back on your answers throughout 2014!

Come back here starting on Monday and link up if you would like! 

Monday - Questions 1-10

Tuesday - Questions 11-20
And Wednesday, wrap it up with Questions 21-25 and any additional thoughts you had during the process!

So, my friends, get centered, get focused, and begin this journey into the BEST year of your life. If you link up, I just ask that you either link back to me in your post or use the button below :) Good luck and I can't wait to read what's on your heart!

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The Best Pants Ever

I've always struggled with finding the "perfect" pants for me… until recently, that is! Now, I should begin by saying that I'm pretty big into brand loyalty. Mainly because I know what I like and once I finally find it, I'm not going anywhere. I wear my favorite boots until the heel wears down, get them repaired several times, and keep wearing them year after year like they were brand new. I'm also the type of person who gets something in every color if I really, really love it that much.

Back to pantalones (pants in Espanol!) I can't tell you how many leggings I've gone through in my life. Why are they all so thinly and cheaply made? Enter LC Lauren Conrad leggings. I bought my first pair (the blue lace pattern, below) over a year ago and keep going back for other colors (when Kohl's puts them on an awesome sale!) They are currently $9.99 and they are the comfiest things ever. They don't dig into my waist and they're a little long on me, how I like them :) Plus, I love that they are thicker than most other leggings I've found.

And then there's Old Navy. Sigh. Thanks to Holly, I became obsessed with Old Navy and all of their stellar sales constantly going on a little over a year ago before I moved to San Diego. I frequented every Old Navy in San Diego & SD County and that is where my love for their Rockstar pants began. Pants have always, always, ALWAYS been SUCH a pain for me due to my petite size. I was either getting pants tailored or trying my best to find a short size in several stores at the mall that always ended up falling short (no pun intended.) 

Somehow, Old Navy's regular length fit me well (with just a little added length.) I've yet to try their petite sizes but that's next on the list! Old Navy has several different fits of their pants and the Rockstar is my favorite. I'd say it's embarrassing just how many of their colored denim I currently have in my closet, but, well… I'm kind of proud :)

LC Lauren Conrad Lace Leggings

LC Lauren Conrad Solid Leggings

Old Navy Coated Wash Skinnies (pictured in Ideal Teal)

Old Navy Color-Wash Jeans (pictured in Garnet)

Old Navy Printed Skinnies in Olive or Oatmeal

Boom. I own at least one pair of each of the above pants and can totally vouch for how comfortable and quality they are. I am a frugal shopper and choose not to spend a fortune (or even more than $50) on a pair of pants. I've been on the hunt for pants that work for the amount I want to spend and for my height. As I write this, each pair is on sale!

Pants are a personal preference. We each have our own, unique bodies and fits that we prefer. These are what work for me and I just thought I'd share! Lastly, here I am rocking the Old Navy Rockstar Printed Skinnies in Olive on a date night :)

P.S. My most recent LC Lauren Conrad leggings were purchased for… free. Gotta love Kohl's Cash! I also got two "free" vests and a top! Double boom. Old Navy has their Super Cash every so often to keep your eye out for. Love it!