"If you could go back just one year, what would you tell yourself? What advice would you offer about everything you've experienced?" - Journal prompt from Sometimes Sweet.
I'm a big-time reflector. I am constantly going back to "where I was one year ago." It keeps me in check. It helps me realize two things:
1. Life is short.
2. A lot can happen in a year.
One year ago, I was living in San Diego. I had recently started dating a man who was a real breath of fresh air. It was around this time last year when things started to change for me. I started letting go of the fear of falling. I was finally ready to put my heart back out there.
He challenged me. In a good way. And it was at this time that I really started to come into my own. I started saying "yes" to new opportunities and experiences and started saying "no" to people and things that didn't align with where I was in my life. And I was at peace with that. For the first time ever.
I started putting my foot down and started standing up for myself. For my dreams. For what I believed to be right. For my previous pains. For my spiritual practice. For my fears. For my body. For my mind.
It was a wonderful, scary, beautiful time of my life. So many transitions were taking place. I had no idea which things were going to stick and which would dissipate. I get this gut-wrenching feeling in my stomach when I visualize being there in those moments one year ago. Gut-wrenching in a positive way. It was all so pivotal for me. So exhilarating. Even with all the challenges that come from uprooting your life again and settling down in a new place with new people, I just felt so alive.
So, looking back... there are some things I'd want to tell my "one year ago" self:
California is for you. It's the place where you flourish most, where your spirit radiates. Think about the people who you connected with. When you leave San Diego in late October, those people will continue to be a part of you. Remember the lessons they taught you. You will think about them each day. You will miss your memories. Your bonding. Your laughter.
And my gosh, you will miss the weather. Stop complaining about it being sunny and warm all. the. time. In September, you will be faced with a tough decision. As you find your purpose and decide to take a new route with your career, know that you are making the right choice to leave. And this will continue to be proven to you through the following months. Though you have to trade the palm trees, Pacific Ocean, and wonderful new friends for this opportunity to start a new business, you'll see these people again. And they will be the most supportive, loving, encouraging people during the journey you embark on.
But, most importantly of all, just remember the way San Diego makes you feel. That feeling never changes. From the second you first visited, to the way you feel one year later just thinking about it. Remember that feeling and carry it with you everyday. That's the feeling of passion. That's the feeling of your soul belonging. That's the feeling that will continue to remind you what it feels like when you're aligned.
Continue to let that feeling guide you. Be around the people who ignite your spirit. Do the things that ignite your happiness. Serve the people who ignite your purpose. Live in the place that ignites your soul. Never settle. No matter how hard it can be sometimes, you know how your heart wants to live. Follow that.